There but for the grace of God ...

I received a call last night from friends out in Osgoode. They called to tell me that the son of a friend was killed in a motorcycle accident. He was pronounced dead at the scene.

The mother in question ... is Dot Janz ... of the famous Red Dot restaurant in Osgoode. The son ... 35 year old Neal. He leaves behind his mum, a sister, a father, a grandmother and a girlfriend and ex-wife. A life cut short way too soon.

Needless to say, a myriad of emotions rushed through me. The obvious sadness, horror and empathy were part of the package ... but for me ... an incredible guilt. Guilt that I was spared this experience ...

I will confess my feelings to Dot ... over a glass of wine, perhaps ... at her new restaurant ... the Black Dog in Manotick. She will understand. Dot is a woman of incredible grace and strength. She spoke to me after Mikey passed ...and after Conor's accident ... and was such a serene presence. No drama ... only calm strength. I only hope that I can return her comfort in kind.

To those of you who are aware of Dot ... there is a guest book provided by the Ottawa Citizen. The website is: http://www.legacy.com/can-ottawa/GB/GuestbookEntry.aspx?&PersonID=87906873. To those of you that do not know Dot ... spare a prayer or a good thought for a mother whose heart is torn in two.

Thank you for allowing me to use this forum for a purpose other than "Conor's Journey". I believe you'll understand the connection between this site ... and a mother's loss and tragedy.